HW 42 - Pregnancy & birth culminating project

I believe that the practice of birth is instinctive, that in our deepest animal instinct, we believe that we need to reproduce in order to keep the human race alive. We need to continue our species. While not everyone does chose to reproduce, and some people even chose to cancel an existing pregnancy. I still believe it to be of human nature to want to reproduce in one way or another. So now how do factors including, family, friends and religion influence people’s choice to have and keep a baby? They all have different perspectives on what they believe the pros and cons of having a child are. I believe that family have the most conscientious approach to raising a child, as they see it as a responsibility and not a toy. Friends look out for your best interests in terms of life style changes and possible career implications. And religion looks out for their best interests, which go along with yours. They are interested in the continuation of their particular breed of faith, and through their new child, they have gained more free advertising through the process of religious labeling. As a result of these three different points of views, I believe that a person gains a total view of whether or not they should have a child.

If a person talks to their parents about having a child, they want to make sure that they know what they are doing, and ask questions such as, “where will the baby sleep?” Or “are you sure you are ready for this?” Author Laura Linnie had a very effective and insightful 5 step process lined up to tackle some of the bigger problems people can experience while debating whether or not to have a child. Her 5 steps are:

1. “Spend lots of "real" time with children of different ages

2. Talk to the people you know who have children.

3. Talk to people who decided they did not want children.

4. Know who you are and what gives you meaning in life first, then determine how children would fit into this picture.

5. Know your answer to why you want or do not want a child.”

I know that these steps may seem obvious, but as a parent asking their child these questions, new fears and new options may arise that they did not think of before. A parent’s job is to make sure that their child is fully prepared for the road ahead of them. Having them fully prepared to have a child is just another requirement of that job. This may not apply to all households, but I believe that it should be a part. In particular, steps three and four are particularly helpful. By examining more then one point of view, you can establish a stronger and more significant view of your own. The significance of this is that from a parent’s point of view, their child should be aware of both sides of the choices that they are about to make so they will be better informed and therefore happier with their eventual decision.

In friends, you look for someone who is kind, understanding, funny, or someone who just makes you happy. By having a friend who looks out for your best interest, you have someone you can trust and therefore will have a bigger impact on your decisions.

“Adolescents report that they are most likely to get information about sexual health issues from their peers (Kaiser Family Foundation, 2000a).”

Because we feel most comfortable talking to our peers, that is who we are going to end up getting the most information from. For pregnant teens, or teens who want to get pregnant, friends may be their only source of information. They may be getting their advice about why they should or should not make such life changing decisions from someone who is their own age. They listen to them because they are the same age and they say what we want to hear. We feel they understand us better. Parents just don’t understand.

Religion plays a huge part in our lives. 83% of Americans say they belong to some religious denomination, and 40% of Americans say they attend some form of weekly religious service. Religion is a source of faith and moral dependability to a lot of people. They look to their religion to guide them down the right path and help them make the right decisions. Religion doesn’t always make them look within themselves, it just asks them to follow rules. One religion might say to have as many children as possible, while another may say to never have children.

“Each major religion has developed moral codes covering issues of sexuality, morality, ethics etc. Though these moral codes do not address issues of sexuality directly, they seek to regulate the situations, which can give rise to sexual interest, and to influence people's sexual activities and practices.” (Wikipedia.org)

The quote itself says very explicitly that it influences their sexual practices. A person will listen to the rules of their religion because of a mix of fear and faith. They believe their “god” or “higher power” will guide them to the right death, and they are afraid of what will happen if they don’t follow their rules then they will be forbidden from a happy life and a happy afterlife. That is why religion plays a heavy influence on whether or not someone has or keeps a child. Some religions discourage abortion, so women keep the babies because they can’t abort them. Other religions encourage a lot of reproduction to keep the religion growing and strong. All of them though have very strong opinions of then choices a mother should make.

In hindsight, it is fair to say that family, friends and religion all play big parts in the process of reproduction. They all contribute in a specific way, and although some may overlap others, they are all necessary in their own way. They all contribute their own point of view to the very intense decision of choosing whether or not to have a baby. Parents contribute background information and the structure. Friends give the pros and the cons to a baby and all the little details, such as horror stories or how amazing the process can really be. Finally religion contributes the faith and fear behind it all, it is the driving force that puts the rest in motion. Now this all may not be true for every single person, but I strongly believe that they are true for the majority of the population. The next step could be how people react to specific suggestions and questions from each category and how those affect their choices. But for now, I think we need to look at what motivates our own decisions and maybe see if we can learn something else from these sources.

Bibliography:

Linnie, Laura. "How to Make the Decision to Have Children Read more: How to Make the Decision to Have Children | eHow.com http://www.ehow.com/how_5198975_make-decision-children.html#ixzz1IUCulmWI." EHow 2011: 1-3. Web. 3 Apr 2011.

Clark, Shelia. "Parents, Peers, and Pressures: Identifying the Influences on Responsible Sexual Decision-Making." National Association of Social Workers 2.2 (2001): 1-7. Web. 3 Apr 2011. .

"Religion and sexuality." Wikipedia.org. 1. 1. San Francisco, CA: Wikimedia Foundation, 2011. Web. .